That must be someone here taking the p1ss! That's uncanny. Who lives near the soon-to-be-closed Heathrow?
Yeah. And when you look at the melted tyres, ground down foot pegs and blown fork seals you realise they must have meant “Belonged to The Doctor”
Unfortunately someone’s already beaten me to “Ads that start with ‘Here we have’...”, so I’ll have to go with a sadly underused but probably very honest quote I saw a while back which was: “For Sale: Brand New R6. Delivery Mileage. Not Even Run In. Only for sale because apparently ‘Do whatever the f*ck you want’ doesn’t mean what I thought it meant” It’s not a sales quote, but surely the most overused buyer’s quote is “WoTs uR bEsT pRiCe m8?” and deserves a dishonourable mention?
"this is the one to go for" Often used by the "here we have" cnut, and means it's the worst model produced of whatever bike or car it is they are selling. The runt of any production line. You also know the vendor is a Pringle sweater wearing p3nis who plays golf and thinks Priti Patel is both foxy and doing a good job.
I remember when my Father-In-Law said “sell my bike on eBay please”. So I said sure..... I then sent him a link of said bike and where I edited out his number plate, I drew a massive black cock. He rang me up and I knew what it was about so I answered “Battersea Dogs home, Jack Russell speaking”...... My humour has no limits, you lucky bastards.
“Needs some TLC” (you‘d better be a good welder) “Easy winter project“ (most of the bike is currently in cardboard boxes) “Viewing recommended” (so you can discover the cracked headstock that I’ve not mentioned in the ad for yourself)
Priti Patel is foxy.....but only in the sense that if you left her alone in your garden she’d probably defecate on your roses and slaughter your chickens