Trivial Things People Do That Make You Disproportionately Cross

Square jars. The person who specced a square jar for cranberry sauce has either never used one or they are a sociopath, as there’s no way to get the last of it out without some sort of special tool. There’s no other explanation.

 

Fingers?

 

Uncouth! Do you think me no better than the beasts of the field?

 

What kind of beasts in your fields have fingers?

 

People (non bikers) who think it's fine to buy you gifts/cards with Harleys/cruisers/choppers on because we'll it's motorbikes isn't it, but if they support Man U and I give them Liverpool stuff because, well it's football isn't it....

 

A prime example - a present from #2 daughter, who thought 'prawn to be wild' was funny...

 

Yep. My ex-mother in law once bought me a book about Harleys as a Xmas present.

 

Feckin actors at awards holier than thou preaching! What did Ricky gervais say.. just come up take your little award and feck off!

 

Trouble!

Especially when the money runs out.

Yada, yada, yada.

 

Clearly you were her favourite!

 

I was actually. She was and is a lovely, kind and gentle woman. Unfortunately those character traits didn't pass down the maternal line, which is why her daughter is my ex-wife.

 

I am trying to picture an expensive woman, I have a few ideas but it's a conundrum.

 

Drivers that go past you on the inside lane of a motorway, then the dumbfucks realise that the HGV on the inside lane IS actually going slower than the middle lane. So then they pull out in front of you when there isn’t a gap. Or then again motorway weavers, downright dangerous fuckers. Also drivers that just have to squeeze past you on the inside on a roundabout.

This is swiftly followed by my loathing when people describe it as ‘Undertaking’. IT IS NOT!

Undertaking is ‘a formal pledge or promise to do something’ and an Undertaker is definitely a person whose business is preparing dead bodies for burial or cremation and making arrangements for funerals. They should definitely not be going fast on a motorway.

It is passing on the inside which is an illegal and dangerous manoeuvre. Sends me nuts.

Oh I feel better now.

Yours,
Victor.

 

They’re the kind of woman that looks and probably smells good and thinks that is enough to do sod all else. Whilst she expects a man to pay for her entire life in exchange for a small amount of affection and sex.

Yeah, I reckon that about sums it up.

Get the picture now?

Avoid.

 

When I drove to the Nurburgring in my 911 with my sons in 2018 some tosser piloting a Range Rover kept trying to do that to me on a Belgian motorway, except that every time he did so, I would just put my foot down and keep pace with him until he had to pull up again, then rinse and repeat. This went on for 70 miles.

 

Good. Yeah I like to box them in as well. There’s 3 lanes on most motorways. Why can’t they use the overtaking lane?

I must admit it’s a special hatred for me.

 

So which one is the overtaking lane then?

 

Unless you are on a motorbike, obviously.

 

The two outside ones, I suggest if people are able to pass you on the inside then you are hogging the middle or outside lane and maybe you should pull in and let them pass in one of the overtaking lanes

 

Which leads us back to one of the original posts on this thread.........people who hog the overtaking lanes on motorways and dual carriageways.