Just a follow on from threads such as University Degrees and Creative Dog Grooming. How many on here are actively grooming their kids, or trying to? Ballerina? Actor? Footballer? Bike Racer? Doing the best for them or vicarious living? Their dreams or yours? Investment for your dotage? My brother for example, has spend 10's of thousands of pounds on his daughter over the last 15 years in the hope she will become a professional/gold medal winning skater. She has done pretty well, but now she's a teenager she has become more interested in her phone! Anyone else?
Some people seem to get obsessed with the special characteristics which only pre-pubertal children have. A good example is boy treble singers ("I'm Walking in the Air", etc). Am I the only one who finds the whole thing really creepy? I mean adults taking pleasure in the high-pitched voices which only boys before puberty have. Personally I dislike seeing young kids exploited and exhibited in this way, and I avoid watching or listening to them.
One of my neighbours moved into their small bungalow from a large family house, a few years ago, to help finance their son to become a ski racer. He got to puberty and discovered booze and girls. He now works in a shoe shop.
I'm grooming my daughter to be happy, no more than that. You're only here once, so enjoy it the best you can.
My lads do well in academia, sports and life in general. both have character traits and areas where they excel. I encourage them to push themselves as far as they can (you only regret what you don't do, in general). eldest has got to county level and premiership academy level rugby union, which is really good, but he is aware that less that 10% of academy players make it to premiership 1st team level so is on for pretty decent gcse grades to ensure he can "get a proper job". youngest is just happy doing rugby and athletics and doing well in school. wherever they are happy, then I am happy to support them in running them around, etc.
I was a sidecar passenger for many years, racing at British Championship level and the IOM TT amongst other events. I know my son would like to take it up (he is 13 at the moment) and if he does he will get all the support in the world form me. However, he can pay for it himself just the same as I did! I'll help him look for sponsors and get him tons of advise from multiple world champions ect to help him along, but I feel you try harder when you have to do the donkey work for yourself and are not gifted it.
My two (girls, 7 and 8) do swimming, gymnastics and ride in a m/c display team, would love to see them do more on bikes but as and when, got to keep in mind who's doing it and why. I look daft in a leotard for example which is why I'm getting them to do gymnastics...
I took the view my son WASNT goi g to be pushed by me. So he's tried everything, failed everything, given up everything, a d sits in his bedroom when not at college. Given my time again, I'd be grooming him like a pony
I'll try to let my kids do what they want. I desperately want my boy to play rugby, but if he doesn't like it so be it. The only time I'll intervene is if I can see them making a big mistake. If they're like me though they'll ignore my advice and go ahead with whatever they want to do anyway!
There is nothing worse as a child then being pushed by pushy parents . Now I work in Education I felt very pressurised and instead of excelling ... I did I got a very niche degree place ... But the more people wanted me to achieve the more I turned to wandering the Streets of London and larking about in pubs ... As I was due to start had a massive row with folks packed a suitcase and did a runner . I never came back. I regret it big time even worse I would have been in class with Noël Fielding !!!!! Dam it!! I was painting for exhibitions pretty young ... Painted every day .. Carried my sketch books and used to sketch stuff or photograph stuff.., Now miss it and I can't break through painters block I can't paint now Encourage and praise ... Praise is the key!! I got the opposite And it sent me running as it will do most kids. Sadly a lot of parents did not achieve their dream of goal and try to live it through their children. Don't .....
i think the schools have it right …..non competitive we don't like winners, its the taking part that counts……. which is why i also agree with the selling off of all sports fields to some mate from the council to introduce his mate the builder to cram an obscene amount of small houses on…….
