Isn't she hungry? She looks hungry. Maybe that's why she's leaning on the door frame. Low blood sugar. Why have you cleaned the bike, in your going-out clothes, in the blazing hot sun, while all your mates are waiting around? How selfish is that and what would your mum say? Why's your tiny meerkat friend up on the tank? You hear that bell ringing? That's Hector Salamanca summoning The Twins. I'd get moving if I were you. If you're going to try to form a human pyramid for the ride out I'd at least scrub in those tyres first. You know you can take your helmet off, right? Are those gloves RiDE magazine approved? They look a bit iffy. Hey Guy Pearce, I loved you in Memento. Not that you'd remember it. Why did you reverse the bike to block somebody's front door like that? Just so that Guy Pearce could put his feet up? That's just weird. Tell your hungry friend that those shoes are an amputation waiting to happen. There's nothing sexy about toe-sucking somebody's stumpy little toe-remnants. She should get some RiDE magazine approved footwear. Ideally with some form of Gore Tex element. You know you look like a twat with an inner-ear balance disorder on his first day at welding school, right?
