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A new sign has just gone up in the home dressing room at Old Trafford: 'NO FALKLANDS JOKES: MAURICIO DOESN'T LIKE THEM'
Did anyone ever find out how much that bloody doggie in the window actually cost??
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A Charity has been set up for people affected by the recent flooding in South East Buckinghamshire. Send your donations to Chiltern in Need.
When asked what the best thing about a blow job was, men's answers varied: 40% said it was the sensuous intimacy in a loving relationship, 40%...
Restaurant toilets are dangerous: So many of my dates have gone to use them... and vanished.
The man who lit fireworks at a Remembrance Day event has been jailed. The man said he was disappointed the court didn't let him off.
Think I’m getting too old for modern technology: Just tried to wipe dust off my iPhone screen and I now have a 12-month subscription to Netflix..
Before the crowbar was invented, did crows used to drink at home?
My mate was working as part of a firework public display team. He accidentally set some off in the wrong direction so they immediately sacked...
Horses for courses, and it's very hard to make direct comparisons between the NHS & private healthcare providers. The demands on their services...
Bravery & fantastic dignity. Rest in peace.
Just had an overnighter at that vagina museum: Slept in snatches...
Meet the new guy at our place of work. Nobody appears to know his name because whenever I ask who he is, my colleagues reply... "Fuck knows."...
I just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
Q. What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle & a badly-dressed man on a unicycle? A. Attire..
At the seance we later contacted the spirit of Shergar, but we had switched to a GeeGee board..
Went to a séance last night & we heard Maurice & Robin Gibb singing 'Stayin' Alive'. Turned out someone had brought a BeeGee Board..
I once took the mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's chamber of horrors and one of the attendants said, “Keep her moving Sir, we're stocktaking.”
