Separate names with a comma.
Available in the shops now: Advent calendars with 370 doors....
Michael Jackson would've had no problem with lockdown. He was always comfortable in bubbles.
The wife wanted something from Chanel for Christmas: It was a bugger of a job to wrap 2 used life jackets & a half-inflated dinghy..
Production is down in Santa’s workshop after many of his workers had to Elf isolate...
Just when we thought 2020 couldn't get any worse: Chris Rea's car has failed its MOT...
Last time I stopped at a hotel in Glasgow I asked for a tartan room: They let me have both...
Juventus say they have no worries about Ronaldo catching coronavirus: He never passes anything to a teammate...
I got a political advent calendar: It's like a normal advent calendar, but there's a dick in number 10.
2 sheep wandered into the local hotel yesterday: One asked for ram service, and the other was looking for the baaa...
Apparently, Maradonna has punched the bucket...
Just you mind your place, and ensure both the Bentley 41/2 and the Range Rover are shiny enough for me to see my reflection in whilst Granger is...
Just been reading some tips on walking dogs at night during winter. One of them was: Carry a flash light. More bloody expense! I only have a...
Q. How do you make a water bed more bouncy? A. Add spring water.
Threw a ball for my dog last night. It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday & he looks great in a suit.
One of our dogs has just won a place on a canine display team. It wasn't easy, and he had to jump through hoops to get it.
Won't be an issue if you are commuting for work purposes. Used my bike to travel to work, and to pick up food/supplies from the supermarket....
Turkey looking for more survivors beneath earthquake rubble. Might be better to use a dog...
Went to an Indian restaurant last night. After I had ordered, a little old lady came to the table & said: "You are very handsome, and you have...
My dyslexic mate said his cock went black last weekend..
Apparently you don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You only need a parachute if you want to go skydiving more than once.
