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A salesman knocked on my door today. "Who currently provides your Internet?" he asked. I said, "My next door neighbour."
Abu Quatada is already lined up to become the next Man City boss, as he knows a thing or two about staying in Europe.
My mate's latest chat up line when he meets a hot woman: "Do you have a picture of yourself so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?"
Q. What do George Michael & a pair of wellies have in common? A. They both get sucked off in bogs.
Looking good! What's that mounted around the header pipe from the front cylinder?
I've not used them myself, but wonder if these guys can help? NRP EXHAUSTS.co.uk | Exhaust, Damaged, Motorcycle, System, Performance | About us -...
Next time just call these boys, they'll open any door.
Michael Jackson never performed at the new Wembley stadium. That makes Joe Hart the only man to appear there wearing gloves for no apparent reason.
The Pope is a lot like Dr Who. He never dies, he just keeps being replaced by white men.
I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock in a nutshell.
I'm in a same sex marriage. The sex is always the same....
The universe has imploded - no matter.
A Sunday School teacher wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that he grew up, etc. So he asked...
Q. How do you make a gypsy take a bath? A. Leave it in your front garden.
A recent survey reported that three quarters of men don't know how to turn on the dish washer. I find that licking her nipples and a light...
That's a lot of Budweiser...! :wink:
Q. What is the difference between George Washington, David Cameron, and your mother-in-law? A. Washington couldn't tell a lie, Cameron can't...
I accidentally clicked on a Daily Mail link at work. Thankfully I managed to switch to some hardcore porn just as someone walked past.
My mate's career at BT was cut short when he stepped on a landline.
A teacher at a school for overweight kids was fired for snorting cocaine. His massive pupils gave him away.
