My Advertising Career

I'm in the meeting to decide the pitch for a supermarket's Christmas ad. One guy suggests lots of fake snow under a clear blue sky with lots of people in their woolly hats and jackets with big smiles.

'Great stuff we will shoot it in the iconic city of Bath!', the manager cries. 'We'll shoot it in July and nobody will notice the odd extra in just their T-shirt'. 'Well it's not out fault that it was one of the hottest summers on record and temperatures where in the high twenties, when we shot it.', he says later.

'Isn't that a bit unrealistic?', says me. 'It has never snowed in Bath at Christmas in living memory and it never snows in this country under clear blue skies. Also most people do their Christmas shopping with a stern, determined look, rather than a big, cheesy smile'.

I am thrown out and sent to the holiday ad planning meeting. Here, we have an empty pool and beach with a very quiet, peaceful hotel with a mother and daughter having a wonderful time. 'But it's not like that as the beach and swimming pool will be packed, with a hotel doing the least amount possible to keep the company sending in the coaches for next year.' I am thrown out of that meeting and facing the sack. My last chance is the toothpaste add.

Here, I have to find a bent dentist to endorse the toothpaste and say that it is vital to keeping your breath from stinking to high heaven and your teeth from dropping out. Finding the bent dentist takes minutes but I can't find any actors with pearly white teeth. No problem as we can digitally enhance the film afterwards. In the editing room we enhance all of the teeth and add a few sparkles, for good measure. The advertising regulators love it and my career is saved.

 

They will inspire anything for the right money.