Top tips!

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by El Toro, Sep 10, 2013.

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  1. Capture the truly amazing experience of a Kate Bush concert by closing your eyes and releasing a thousand wasps into a creche
     
    #61 El Toro, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 1
  2. Women: constantly go on about how you'll never understand men, oblivious to the fact it's because you're not as clever as them.
     
    #62 El Toro, Sep 3, 2014
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  3. [​IMG]
     
    #63 Char, Sep 3, 2014
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    • Funny Funny x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  4. AS my old man used up say "don't take advice from anyone"
     
    #64 El Toro, Sep 3, 2014
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  5. Don't leave the cap of a felt tip pen
     
    #65 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  6. Do not expect to be able to use the rest of the silicone tube a month after last opened.
     
    #66 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 2
  7. Realise, super glue is not super, it can't fly, it sticks shit
     
    #67 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  8. don't go to bed with an itchy bum
     
    #68 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  9. look after your kids, you will need them someday
     
    #69 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  10. er, white ankle socks with trainers is not cool, no matter what American tourists tell you
     
    #70 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  11. eat plenty of oranges
     
    #71 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  12. eat plenty of apples
     
    #72 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
  13. do not waste 3 months of your life, all home brew is shit
     
    #73 Evoarrow, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 1
  14. post frequently
     
    #74 Chris, Sep 3, 2014
    • Funny Funny x 1
  15. even if it's bollocks
     
    #75 Exige, Sep 3, 2014
    • Funny Funny x 1
  16. EMPLOYEES: Only use the loo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid.

    MOTORISTS: When going through a speed camera, flash your lights twice quickly and watch the driver in front hit his brakes when he thinks he's been caught.

    Wow, this is a virus thread....
     
    #76 Kirky, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 1
  17. [​IMG]
     
    #77 El Toro, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 1
  18. Colleen Rooney: Increase the number of holidays that you go on in 2015,more so than the paltry 9 that you've been on so far this year,by simply becoming a teacher.....or Prime Minister.
     
    #78 El Toro, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 1
  19. Scotland: Don't worry about having to change currency after independence, as the Giro will still be valid.
     
    #79 El Toro, Sep 3, 2014
    • Like Like x 1

  20. Oooooh, that's harsh. There is a girl in my office (next desk to mine in fact) who is from Nuneaton, right little cutie, and a great personality as well.
     
    #80 philoldsmobile, Sep 3, 2014
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